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My depression

  1. I feel like im trapped
  2. Inside of my self
  3. My own damn mind
  4. Feels like a cell
  5. Stuck behind these bars
  6. leaving me emotionally scarred
  7. And this shit is just totally harsh
  8. Just sitting here hopelessly on my arse
  9. Fuck this shit has broken me fast
  10. I thought i could last
  11. But im well bellow my class
  12. Well bellow the last person who brought up my past
  13. Well bellow every person that walks past
  14. Well bellow the councilors who are working too hard
  15. I dont have fucking problems
  16. Im not sick im just scarred
  17. Im not a prick im just harsh
  18. Im not thick i chose to come last
  19. I chose to walk the path
  20. That leads back to where i start
  21. Coz i cant leave behind my fucking past
  22. Its just too hard
  23. I cant control my self at times
  24. Coz i hate it when people laugh
  25. Staring at me like im crazy
  26. Im just depressed and ive lost my chance
  27. To make something of my self
  28. Coz i was too fast
  29. To push people away
  30. When all they wanted was to help me be in charge
  31. And take control of my self
  32. And forget about my past
  33. To cover up my scars
  34. And to help me realise who the important people are
  35. But now im stuck here
  36. I was so close yet so far
  37. My brain distorted i wish i was aborted
  38. I just dont give my self a chance
  39. Maybe im just too hard
  40. Maybe i set my goals too far
  41. Because i cant reach them
  42. I cant see them
  43. So how the fuck can i beat them
  44. Im so hungry right now
  45. I just wanna eat them
  46. Defeat them and never leave them
  47. Looks may be deceiving
  48. But i swear if i dont pull my self togeather
  49. Ill just stop breathing
  50. Just give me a reason
  51. To give the trigger a good squeezing
  52. This is what happens
  53. When people stop believing
  54. When people rob my feelings
  55. And show me no respect
  56. When i was being even
  57. So now all my freinds are just a bunch of heathens
  58. Fucking snakes with no brains between them
  59. My lifes a constant cycle of cold rainy seasons
  60. A constant fight when at night im slaying these demons
  61. Walking for miles accross eighty different regions
  62. To find a reason
  63. To pray for no more beatings
  64. I cant take no more bleeding
  65. No more bruises for me please
  66. But it still fucking happens every time i speak
  67. Every time i pick up the mic and spit to a beat
  68. With every line i write there criticising me
  69. Ill just sit and cry until they finish finally
  70. So violently fighting me its frightening
  71. My world is spiraling
  72. The skys are showing no signs of it brightening
  73. Its got me anxious to the point im tearing out pages
  74. From this pad that im writing in
  75. Violent streaks cross my mind
  76. Like lightning sweeps across the nights sky
  77. Tonights the night i end this
  78. Tonights the night i die
  79. Because this depression
  80. Has built so much aggresions
  81. Ive just been hungry for attention
  82. Constantly left in suspense
  83. Now i need another lesson
  84. Coz all this shits confusing
  85. And im constantly guessing
  86. Asking way too many questions
  87. And receiving no answers
  88. What the fuck was i expecting
  89. Im praying for a blessing
  90. Praying that i can repent from my sins
  91. When im in the booth confessing
  92. And people will stop judging me and second guessing
  93. Just because im different
  94. Dont mean i dont need no affection
  95. Sometimes i just wanna cry
  96. Due to my depression
  97. Sometimes i wanna die
  98. Due to my depression
  99. Sometimes i wanna leave the world behind
  100. Due to my depression
  101. But i cant becuase its selfish
  102. And my family wont sleep another second
  103. And how can i leave them
  104. Forever feeling threatened
  105. Thats just fucking sick
  106. I couldnt do that my time in hell would be lengthened
  107. And that type of shit just attracts
  108. The wrong type of attention
  109. Ive been given more bad names
  110. Than fucking school detentions
  111. Its makes me feel sick
  112. When i stare at my reflection
  113. I just wanna flip and break the fucking mirror
  114. Coz then maybe i can sit snd see the world clearer
  115. And ive been told that im insane
  116. But i aint no serial killer
  117. Ive been told that im deranged
  118. But i aint no garry glitter
  119. Im not some fucking weirdo
  120. Pyscopathic kiddy fidler
  121. Im just an normal kid
  122. Trying to see the bigger picture
  123. Make something of my self
  124. And help my mum become a bit more richer
  125. Im glad i cut my dad out my life
  126. And did the same with family pictures
  127. With a pair of scissors
  128. Ripped them up and threw them out in the blizzard
  129. Let the storm take them away
  130. And pray ill be forgiven
  131. But im not the one who should be shitting
  132. Bricks it should be the sick prick
  133. That calls him self dad and used to give my mum
  134. A fat lip
  135. This shits just tragic
  136. I remember crying for hours in the fucking attic
  137. My mind was like a tv
  138. But all i saw was static
  139. Kinda how my dad did
  140. When he was always drunk
  141. Throwing his arms around
  142. Fucking stupid abusive cunt
  143. He never cared for me my sister or mum
  144. He just used to fucking hit her
  145. The ruthless punk
  146. But its over now
  147. All thats shits done
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Lyrics added by Narrator

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