Night Fright

I woke up in the middle of the night with a fright to a noise that was blinding.

Thoughts were grinding, lighting up for all to see.

The conscious tuned into the melody of the subconscious from ritual formalities and tedious strategies.

After these deeds were done.

I changed to one, became dangerous by making a fuss.

By a touch of dumb luck I became unstuck.

One day I saw it, eleven, eleven.

That became the hunt. Looking for signs, reading between the lines.

Checking the facts, checking the lies.

All under the watchful eyes of the don't miss nothing.

I started to find patterns, that's when the numen clued in then began.

The riddling answers, the co-dancers around the bush, the more I started to push.

I sat in the dirt made tears fall until it hurt and from that I learnt.

How to breathe, how to sit still in ease, do nothing but increase the capacity to understand reality.

I'll stand in the totality of reality and bare witness to the greatness but all I saw was the dark.

Not the spark of light nor the might of The King, God or thing.

My hands bleed.

I've been praying on my knees for the last hour.

Thinking that the deeds I've done, all lead to one misery and what has been past down is now my enemy.