I Grew Up
• Written by GraceChristiana
There was once a little girl,
she was always smiling n happy
loved everyone n everything.
//
She got a little older,
and then her daddy told her,
mommy don't want me no more,
I'm movin' out I'm leavin'
I'll still see you I promise.
She listened, she believed him.
//
She was only five years old,
takin' care of her sister,
her mom had stopped caring,
she didn't know what to do.
//
She would visit her dad but,
it wasn't very often.
She used to be a happy kid,
but some of that happiness,
got taken away the,
day that her dad did.
//
She grew up a little more,
she tried to ignore the fact,
that she knew her dad didn't care,
he didn't and he never did,
she was tired of tryin' to be,
somebody that he would love,
when all he cared about were drugs.
//
He lied to her, all the time,
but she didn't know it, after all
she was only twelve years old.
//
At twelve she had depression,
but she didn't know, she was sad,
all the time she just wanted to die.
That happy little girl grew up,
as she did her happiness didn't,
it started dying, fading away.
//
She grew up a little more,
her mom told her the truth,
about her dad n what he did.
He was doing drugs n cheatin,
he was with other girls,
he was beating his kids n wife,
that's why she made him leave,
that's why he had to go.
//
She grew up a bit more,
now she's fifteen years old,
hasn't seen her dad in three months,
she doesn't care anymore she quit,
she's done her best friend died,
she committed suicide,
so why doesn't she? She's cryin',
she's screamin' just wishin' she would die,
just wishing it was over.
//
There are scars on her wrists,
there are scars on her thighs.
And now everytime
she sees a razorblade,
pills, rope, or even lighters,
all she can think about is,
self harming or suicide.
//
All of her happiness was gone,
she was getting bullied,
what was the point? If no one loved her.
Why didn't she just grab that rope and jump?
It wasn't so hard, was it?
But it was, because she cared,
she cared, about all those people,
the people she thought didn't love her,
she didn't want to hurt them,
when they were the ones who hurt her.
//
There were many times when,
she sat with a paper and a pen,
just writin' her death note.
She could never do it though.
//
She was so good at acting,
nobody ever knew she was sad,
to the people at school she was,
the happiest person alive.
She plastered on that fake smile,
she did it so much, so much
that she started to believe it.
Then one day she crashed,
she crashed so hard she sat down,
she wrote this song and she died,
later that night she committed suicide.
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About the Artist
GraceChristiana
Member since January 16 2016