A Tongue Of Cursive

 

 

In a time

When I care too god damned much

Yet I still dont care Just quite enough

 

So far from myself and it felt like a hell in a way

While i fell from my Body

And my grip slowly losing its touch

 

 

Metaphores lost in performance

Yet a locked door before diligant minds

That keep recording

Like an accordion playing the folkish tunes in a war band

 

Circulating Novelties by popular demand

and The firm operation carried out assholes barking commands

 

Behind the Back of my villanous ways

They hide to far from me to catch a glance

But i hear them talking shit while they laugh.

 

 

What would make it better

 

Getting sober and pretending life is just fine and quaint and dainty

 

Abandon all of my commitments

just for all of you dumb motherfuckers

To still mistreat me and fuck with me,

Because you literally Want me dead, yet have little grounds

And a weak foundations, But fucking hate me?

 

Maybe, I'm just going crazy

If the efforts were worth it, I'd be alittle less lazy

 

But everytime I come with no purpose

and hands baren empty

I feel myself like a darkness with a light cast upon it

Fading away in a blend of nocturnal emission

Again I tend to offend with my blasphemous heart

And It would rip me in half If i found Another pointless relationship

that left me barred in scarrs with nothing to show for it

and years wasted from waiting

And i still became the enemy

 

That made the mistake of being honest in a world of liars and perverts

That wait til i'm sleeping and watch the demons i trapped violently rape me

I'd be half convinced most of the lot

Get viciously excited masturbating

unaware of the price that im paying

 

For sparing Too many people of the evil that they created

and then watched as they all walked away alone with these

Monsters To leave me drained and a mind once fruitful

Now devastated

 

People think I'm playing

But dont get it

I hunt Evil

And have a mind thats strong enough to contain the entities

and simply absorb the pain

All the while I'm surrounded by people who simply see

an easy way out of their anger and hatred

and I'm standing all vulnerable

Weak and frail

Fresh for the taking

 

 

All of my life

I've lived with not a single broken bone

Just a plan to get home

 

Where ever the hell that might be

I'd like to think Its with in myself

But I dont want to finish this Whole god damned existance,

And end up On my own

Below the pits of the fact

That

Even though i had existed to grow

I still havent Grown

 

A king Sitting alone in a solitary throne

Has no Kingdom

Except the kingdom

That he himself had overthrown

 

The transition doesnt make any sense to a man speaking to an empty field

Talking political Debates with a loud speaker phone

 

People just walking by shaking their heads

As if I was the one who had lost his mind

When in reality

They live for a lie

And i think of the world we're gonna leave behind

I was raised knowing that its up to us

To give the next of kin the most

 

And my eye twitches as i write this

Watching my son thrash the living room me and his mother

just cleaned

Because He has a tag on his shirt he wanted of

Or disney channel wasnt playing the fucking cartoon

He chose

 

So now To hell with the world. My kids going mad

and so Are his mother and me

I got a heart covered in the sheets of Ice now adays

Because i came here to make a difference

But people are spoiled just like my Son

 

And if they dont get their way

They will throw tantrums and scream

 

Or do what they're doing to me

Just because I want to Teach

and educate But because i need drugs to fight the darkness

That dwells deep beneath

I am a spirit unclean

And I am the Devil himself

Because i tell people to think

 

Then they lock me up, and hand me a glass of brewed wolfs bane

And demand i take my life

Just as they had once done to the Great Socrates

 

But your religion Are answers you can't question

But my philosiphy are answers that i may never reach

Baptise me please

And dunk me under the purified and holy saturation

While you keep hold my neck down

So i stay underneath

And feel blood rush into my mouth

Lungs collapse

To bad That i was so evil

I wasnt able to breath

 

I wont say give mercy to me

I wont scream for God as much as i once did

 

And in this time

The prime of my life

I honestly should feel strong

But i feel nimble Yet weak

From a disease

That you couldnt begin to understand,

 

And you if you think you know shit about it

I promise you

 

You aint got the first Idea about what it means to me

The mind of me.