“Yuck Mouth”

I’m a yuck mouth!

My waist is widening out

My teeth are rotting now

Blood clotting and heart throbbing

There’s no doubt

I’m a yuck mouth!

I’m a yuck mouth!

 

My tummy feels funny; must be something I ate

Either the lunch truck sushi or the raw cooked steak

For my workout routine, I lift a burger to my mouth

It keeps me motivated while my health is heading south

I’ll eat enough chocolate to put Wonka out of business

The horror on Halloween is seeing me eat Hersey Kisses

I am so hungry now that I could actually eat horses

That not a metaphor, it would be the entrée of three courses

I broke the balance because I never eat a balanced diet

My butt’s big, I can’t lie, and Sir-Mix-A-Lot likes it

On a scale from one to ten, my cholesterol’s eleven

I’ll be on dialysis as my kidneys’ start to deaden

I now have enough blubber to be recruited by Sea World

To have audiences cheer while the trainer screams “twirl!”

My abnormal heart rate makes the monitor re-calibrate

Should I eat more now, or should I wait and reevaluate?

 

[Chorus]

 

It started out with Mac ’n’ cheese and microwavable food

But I packed on the pounds and added weight to my glutes

McDonald’s, KFC, and Taco Bell are my menu

My gut started to swell, but I won’t choose another venue

I have eaten muffins until I have a muffin top

And I continue to eat because I know I’ll never stop

A pizza pie soon became my snack serving size

As I deny what the nutrition fact label implies

I mix sodas so you could get diabetes with one sip

I try to share my recipe, but nobody wants it

Each weekend I’ve hugged the Percaline God

Emptying intestines of the unfortunate rot

As arteries protest that they are going to clot

My heart is on strike saying it’s going to pop

Gluten-free fanatics regard my feasting with misgiving

And vegans are now protesting my reason for living

 

[Chorus]

 

It’s easy as pie to eat a piece of the cake

That’s why you’ve got to try to watch your intake

If you keep overeating, your stomach will ache

And by that time it’s way too late

 

[Chorus]

 

I’m a yuck mouth! I’m a yuck mouth!

Over the teeth and through the gums

Watch out stomach, here it comes!

I’m a yuck mouth! I’m a yuck mouth!

Over the teeth and through the gums

Watch out stomach, here it comes!