Never Say This (Soon to Be Recor...

There's some other shit in my life that I just can't explain,

growing up poor and middle class, different sides of pain,

and I said goodbye to childhood, was a king who would reign,

now I only see the dark nights and clouds, skies rain,

and again and again, I'm just trying to refrain,

same difference, as a kid, I was bullied, called me "lame",

people up in cultured cities didn't understand the twang,

Southern slang, product of the red states, Mark Twain,

dang, I was ashamed, still every day I play my game,

as best I can, I pray to God and hope I never hear my name,

stuck inside this blank frame, people say its picture perfect,

but I know it's worthless, empty smiles, when's it gonna change?

Sam Cooke, I'll switch lanes and hope that y'all remember me,

and hope that all these messages engrave into your memory,

still inside this life I feel that pressure, I've made enemies,

so I find my rhythm and I hum some tunes and melodies,

and I find my feelings and emotions as I write these words,

sometimes I just need to vent, it's not like I like to curse,

or say some ig'nant shit I didn't mean, that turns to hurt,

the person I was friends with who turned back, repeat, rehearse,

and every time I speak a verse I try to get away from stress,

escape at best but every time I make a mess and play the rest,

of some smooth jazz albums up, up through my tape cassette,

I'd never be the one to drink or go to smokes or blaze the cess,

and Mama told me "all you need are just a couple of your friends",

"and all these others don't matter", she'd say again and again,

I'd never with intention ever go commit a sin,

but sometimes struggles trouble you, so I pick up the pen,

and try to write some stuff like this, but then at some times,

I try to spill my heart through paper and ink, can't find a word to rhyme,

rarely does light shine in the gutter, but through the wrath,

I try to grasp to my humanity, but find the empty paths,

stuck inside this quicksand, with both legs and knees in deep,

findin' no one else relates to pain I have, can't speak to me,

and even though I say "forget 'em" and go on in decency,

I still can't find my inner self and I play who y'all need to be,

through the troubles and the struggles and reflections in the gutters,

through the waste and through the rubble, I still find we're brothers,

and I try to link and organize communities, we hate one another,

but I find we'd make a difference if we understood each other