Outter Worldly Tales

I'm not a quitter, just a pinch hitter, pissed off cause I missed dinner

So I broke free like Skynrd, and then screamed “I'm a winner”

But it seemed I was a fibber, some guy stabbed me in the liver,

His voice was graveley like a wizard, skin wrinkly like a lizard.

I said “look at my gizzards, you outtered my innards.

What the fuck dude? Cold as a blizard in winter.”

He said “gee I'm sorry but I only wanted part of your body,

An organ for my zombie, I'm a mad scientist making an army.

And I put a zip tie round your wrists so don't try and stop me"

He tried to tie my feet up but his knotting was sloppy.

So I kicked in his noggin with the force of a speedin' toboggan,

He was bleedin and sobbin, tellin me to please stop it.

I heard someone yell "FREEZE!": coppers. So I got to the chopper!

No one's as hungry as me with these chompers, I see n' conquer.

If we Congress you're peace offer oughta be more than three dollars.

I'm a mean monster that you wanna appease often.

 

Tales are outta this world like a monkey in space.

Funny it ain't, I'm bananas yeah just keep running the tape