Toxic (just had to get this of m...

I'm toxic I'm not sick

not an alcoholic?

theres no need to panic

just got this urge to drink

till i cant speak or think

throw fits, I'm tired of this

 

should i go for the gold, or keep going down this road

straight into a ditch hole, spinning outta control

 

or just play out this role, of being a crazy bitch

who has no control, of her soul, by staying clean

 

just want to drill a hole, thru my skull

and start feel whole, should i say fuck all?!

 

dont know what to do, I'm all outta moves, and this aint chess

guess I've got nothing to prove, feel I've been shot through the chest

 

bullet proof vest has been removed, I've got nothing to lose

I've been put to the test, don't know how to reset, refresh,

 

this life full of re- grets, im a fool with bottled up secrets

this time it's no game, so fuck fame, i just wanna feel sane

 

try to feel safe, dont wanna feel shame, my life is insane,

never once won a single game, I don't mean to complain

 

but I'm in a sink hole again, I'm getting concerned

im sinking in pain time and again, feeling like cutting my veins

 

while i scream why care?! life aint fair, dare to start over?

oh wait, ive got a hangover, and I cant stay sober

 

no matter that i get older, I still cant get over

my mothers death, and the man that stole my breath, what a mess!

 

thats all that goes on in my head, i'm alive but i'm dead,

I really wish there was a huge hole, in this shitty earth,

 

that could just swallow me whole, because this really hurts

oh no, no one follow me, I'm literally cursed

 

I'm toxic, I'm not sick

not an alcoholic?

no need to panic

just got this urge to drink

till i cant speak or think

throw fits, tired of this

 

needed an inspiration and i found him

lost him faster than.. oh wait need to vomit

god dammit! (ok I'm back, i got it)

 

as I was saying..

 

I lost him faster than the speed of light oh my

I might still be high from all the speed i took last night

 

why? i dont know it felt right, to feel light, see bright

nice bright colors in my head thinking its all right,

 

in the end, no colors no light, just black and white

no colors, no light just sad and blind, I'm toxic!