Lil Clown's Story

18:45 to 21:53

The Heroin In My moms System

Was too much for me to Listen

so I remained distant as I Went into the Kitchen

Dad was Missing For years Brought tears to my Eyes

So here's the Story of the Clown who Faked a Smile

And every once in a while Found Love through the Hate

But He Hated Who he Became So Fucking Deranged

He has a Damaged Brain and Shit he Knows things wont be the Same

Since The Day One of His friends Was Killed By 9 Bullets Life is Bullshit

If only He could Be the Talk of the Town But I Doubt they want to

Give me The crown So Here I Am Drowning And than She

Asked me what is there to Complain About:? Well People Always Lying

Disguising Disgust As Love and All Through it All maybe if I Jumped

Off the Blue Bridge Ill be Death Defying Mr. Superman Who's got a

50 Foot Wingspan Because He has really Got No Other Plan

Remembered When The Alcohol and the Xans Were his Biggest Problem

Wishing I could Put my Depression it some Solvent To Dissolve It all

But I guess It never Really Leaves Don't it?

It Can Move away For a Lil Bit but It Becomes Broke and Comes Back

And to Top it all The constant Panic Attacks.. Fuck what am i going to do I Feel

The Stress Building Up Wishing I could Tear it Down But The Walls are

Too Strong For me I'm about to Break Down... So here's Lil Clown All Alone

Next to a Glass Of Patron Put his Best friend on the Phone and Told him

To Take Care Make Sure My Family Is Taken Care of Though I guess you Reap

What you Sow I feel as If life is Going to Slow i need to Speed it Up

Maybe if i Roll the Dutch Id start Giving Less a Fuck but What good will that Do?

It Wont change the Fact Your Friend Marley Hates you For no Apparent Reason

I felt the Treason Guess she changed From Summer to Fall Season

Now its Freezing Outside I Look Around and Not a Soul to Be Found

So Now Im walking Towards The Bridge.. I hope My family Can get over this..

Because Right Now im Living In Hell and Id rather Kill Myself than to

See you With Someone Else.. All i wanted to do was Record Music But

How is Poetry Going to fix This? All I ever Felt Was Emptiness Until You came Around

And than You fucking Tore Me Apart You gave me a Broken Heart..

So Here I am Sitting All Alone in a Dusty Old Monte Carlo.. With No Marley Marlowe.

With a 40 Caliber Aimed at My Head

In the end I Guess i always wanted to paint the inside of the Car Red...