Apologies
• Written by Adaris
I used to act fast
so I could have the last laugh
'fore the doc said to decaf the riffraff
used to laugh, till i got medicated
now I can't, it's faded like the glint
in a jaded soldier's eyes, eviscerated
so it's a life wasted
In a trance I waited
who knew it'd be so
complicated man I'm dedicated
is it the Vyvanse ? Maybe
but this is my chance
I'd rather die than collapse
my mind constantly lapses
I needed glasses to see how
meds run laps around the masses
they gave me a rush, was fantastic
now all i feel is sadness as I lay
down on my mattress and look at the roof
anxiety rising, poised to get paranoid
i do not enjoy this pain
but i will not disappoint
nor play the blame game
I ain't lil Wayne i can see when my
talent wanes, i'm in chains
put my head through a window pane
i don't want the fame
destitute like a poor man with no name
and despite being a zombie
more dead than you would want me
I don't hear no complaints from
the teachers, it's a shame to see but
i guess it's better than huffing ether
and seeing whether Ethan was leaving
it's beating season and its treason
not to be a demon
Schoolyard rules
don't get me tempted
i'll put a bullet into you
or a brick to the dome
shoot up your family in
your own damn home
'fore i continue ripping this paper
with the tip of my fountain pen
deciphering these words
like a mountain of men
working to the end of the line
these are my rhymes and my story
till the end of time
locked away in my mind
and I ain't commit no crimes
all I am is a broken man in his prime
sounds asinine but i walk a fine line
between lacking a spine
and being a walking punchline
see every day of my youth i
was bullied i concede
you can see, school is a breeding ground
for people like these
those who want power
cos their own life
keeps getting harder
they take it out on others
anyone smarter
I'm guilty of it too, i had a
skewed view but thats no excuse
to lead someone to drink booze
in their youth to try to sort their issues
and i'm really sorry
for all the things that i said Johnny
i was confused so i abused
just to amuse myself and introduce
my self-loathing to you
And I don't want you to misconstrue
this ain't impromptu it's overdue
speaking of the truth while i'm
rapping in the booth
spitting so hard that I've
lost a tooth yet i refuse to improve
cos i be limiting myself by destroying
my health and grandiose visions I be
fornicating with myself
thinking i'm the greatest
ignoring naysayers
labelling them haters
sayonara catch ya later
yet i be desecrating the
legacy of the greatest OG's
that the world's ever seen
conquerors of the seven seas
bitches please , like scurvy
it's a disease that's got me
begging on my knees
as the genre moves forward but
my music goes freeze
wheels turning backwards with
every slight breeze causing me to sneeze
got writers block when i thought i had it all
Flip a rock, see my beard turn my clippers on
wanna see my face in the paper
gotta stay the same to remain famous
gotta keep the focus on the social locus
Feel like I'm doing my seven labours
History ain't doing me any favours
been through enough as a kid
seen enough that I did
got my start, had a fit
self destruct bottoms up
thats all that it is
[end]
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About the Artist
Adaris
Member since October 16 2016