Medication and Meditation

i need medication along with some meditation

as i try to cope with what im facin.

we talk among our self's.

and they convinced me we are all going to hell

dont know if i gave up.

i need to know so i pour myself another cup.

sit on the floor and began to think.

start to go inside my head fall back and blink

have a Epiphany in my sleep

and i get takin away in the beat.

another world where strange people is all i meet.

but they have a lot of knowledge to teach.

like how to know yourself im not trying to im not trying to preach.

the class room outside the class room is where i take my seat.

drift away im on the outer reach.

Learned a lot but still a lot to learn.

I love to play with fire i can show you every burn.

Been played a couple times.

Thought i had a quarter but they where just a couple dimes.

i realized love is not what im trying to find.

dont really know what im looking for im confused not blind.

i just done with this game.

Done with this path so i switch to the other lane.

One sided expectations can destroy you and your brain.

Its probably the reason im insane.

the reason i kinda enjoy the pain.

look at what you did i will never be the same.

used to not be like this its a shame.

used to love the sun but now i stand in the rain.

stopped looking for things to blame

Think happy thoughts?

kinda cant when they are all tied in knots.

plus there scared from all the battles i fought.

People tend judge me.

Because im a "drugie".

and all my thoughts are empty and bloody.

I wonder why.

just take a second and look through my eyes.

put a smile on and thats my disguise

Its hard to be normal when your brains fried.

Dont live just to die .live to go beyond the sky.

set new goals reach new limits.

take your time it doesn't happen in a minute

im trying to go against the norm.

against the current. my speech kills like a automatic turret.

hope i can change things before it all crashes down.

no one believes what i stand for to them im just a fuckin clown.

When really there servants of the money thats all around.

music is my tool and my heart beat is the sound.

sadly this is the only life i know.

and thats something im not afraid to show.

i would never want my life to be any different

im a product of my environment.

and i never will quit its to early for retirement

cant stop now.

I've gone to far and yelled to loud.

and im proud.

i will always be myself and never part of some crowd.

Im one of a kind

and hopefully i can change this world with a rhyme.

thats strategically put in one line.