Everything Lost!

This news that you have gave me perhaps was one relapse for mind to understand so ill put it into these raps, I promise I will put up this fight and I wont collapse, however as I much I tried always did I fail I’m at the brink too much too say and I cannot think yet I always at the edge of de-rail, oh so I just came home your telling me we gotta pack our bags and leave, I refuse and my heart just falls like a leaf, you don’t understand what your putting me through, you think you can just make connections and disconnect them in an instant like disconnections, you have injected pain in me like those injections like I had an infection, listen In life I am the commander of my own ship, now your asking me why “son why you gotta flip” Oh I’ll tell you quietly and I’ll most likely say this nicely just promise you wont be angry at me so angrily, what I go through everyday is not coincidence and it does not happen coincidentially, I refuse because I have made so many friends so many allies in alliance now you wonder why I don’t wanna go through this moving and defiance, I rely on the one true god Allah in reliance, without a doubt I wish I could say to this world I DO NOT WANNA MOVE and just shout all my life moving this and moving that its what its been all about, I promise on that promise that this is not a doubt, Why cant you see in my eyes in my perception, why is it always you choosing these decisions through this deceptions, I refuse to move look at me now almost 17 I may not have any talents got called down in office by the dean, fine you want me to be honest I will there is a girl, thinking about me moving now from here makes me wanna hurl, everyday thinking about her will leave my life a twirl, it was destroyed once however that time was one, You wanna move again screw that life cant be played around like that now I’m done, Still don’t understand why you cant find a job here in this country probably because you like starting over, you know what I’m gonna pack my backs so we can get on that rover, What I write probably making any sense but that’s why we don’t have to move don’t you understand cut this suspense and you can leave this idea of having to move its complete garbage just let it dispense, recognize what I write as my talent perhaps we can all go vote on it with a ballot, so many connections and ties just broken in an instant of time of what I call it, surely I don’t wanna move why you gotta make me lose my mind, I think I lost track of time, this is indisputable what if it truly is incontestable, what if what I write is actually completely relatable, I will refuse and deny, I’d rather do suicide and just die then go over to Carolina and just 24/7 do nothing but cry, understand me as this as my final wish I do not want to move and make my life a stinkin’rottin’ fish, sure you may beat me for denying but I promise without a doubt if you make me move I will never be laughing or smiling, understand every word that I write because it is conspicuous and I CAN SAY it is meticulous the crap that I go through life may be ridiculous, but hey that’s life and I accept all that, but I do not want to start over and move and flow back, if I do perhaps that is one setback, all these mixed feelings and emotions are a punch in the gut like a power pack, especially thinking about her, your probably thinking “Oh Brother”, tell you what how about we never move PLEASE I ask nicely put it in this poetry that is just my theory, and I’ll rethink my thoughts about running away and living in that gutter, please just do not reslice and slice this life dice like and open cutter, help somebody im bleeding, no you fool not externally, but internally, what I received and perceived was an internal heart bleed, heck I even forgot about all nice times playing assassins creed, Heck I’ll be promised to the fact if we do not move I will most likely start on good deeds, Moving away is like moving to a different planet, where no one understands you and you cannot stand it no longer understand it, I am the commander of my own ship and I command it, Understand there is a girl I like to the very core of my heart, now think about this why would you make me depart and diverge our paths cause I don’t wanna go apart, I’m frozen to the bones why I write this is a complete mystery , if you make me move I think I’ll overdose myself of ecstasy everyday day-in-day out why I think of her is a complete a fantasy, yes I’ll be depressed, quite possibly if you make me move I’ll be of those who are oppressed, its not what I contracted its what you put you in me like I was dissected, these words may be contradicted, however I am not a dictator and never would I be dictated, all my life it was either be followed or follow what you make go through in the next 5 months is sorrow, you have caused a frostflame blizzard that life has no meaning and it has no tomorrow, nothing lost or harnessed perhaps nothing gained I don’t wanna lose my friends cause if I do nothing remained, quite possibly ill be that bad kid being a criminal saying that cops just detained, so reckless I don’t wanna start over im in pain, I’d rather jump out of the window pane end my life in instant, I don’t wanna put space and disgrace between me and her like its so distinct, truly everything lost nothing can be made up why’re you telling me to move that plan is fake-up without a doubt it’s a plan that looks beautiful with make-up, listen to me how about we not move, change your minds change your future what I write is now will be in your tongue like a clay mixture if I write this so powerfully what if just what if it stays in your heart forever!