a boat amidst a lake of darkened...

Sometimes I simply can’t help the hell that my mind crosses

Protected by caution, demented and unwell

I can’t dispel the defined monsters

Like a cancer, they spread

Weave between and within the threads

Like dancers, boiling and seething within my head

From morning to evening, I’m feeling dread

I need answers, frantically clutching at different ends

The fourteenth of the second, the day I was blessed with God’s gift

Protected by her presence, I was open-hearted

A lesson in time, never let go of what your heart grips

The dark place of which you’ll fall stands tall in the face of Hell

You’ll never tell another lie, displace another scorn

Nothing but mourn, you’ll understand the grace of which you held

I speak from a sundered Soul

Weep like I’m uncontrolled

I only wish I had the chance to tell you

Just how much I loved you when I grabbed and held you

But now I can’t and that’s the stab that now proves

Worn upon my chest like the burden I stand to

I simply wish I was a better man but now I can’t and I’ll have to handle that, too

Words can be spoken a million times

But it’s the heart within ‘em that reveals what’s within the lines

So here’s my heart and my pen, instruments of truth to deceiving eyes

Whatever you truly believe, just see me beneath the heat of God

For whatever I say I truly mean, and I miss you more than I miss my mind...

And the truth is it hurts...

It really, really hurts...

It feels like I'm crucified every day that I'm awake

And you and I was just a taunt for my mind to go replay

I can't take you off my mind, I'd rather die than see my fate

'Cos my fate is the fact I'll never have you in your grace

So as the blood runs from the crown of thorns

Dug into my skin, I can't even think with the crowd's applause

My solemn eyes scan around, I searched but never found my get-out clause

The nails pin my wrists, my chest pules as I try to grab across

Pull off my body from the grounded cross but I can't, it's far

I'm restricted just as I am to tell you I miss you

Everything in this world I could do to convince you

I simply can't seem to better myself, my mental health was the issue

So I wrote this understanding I'll probably never get to

Let you know how much you meant when I had the chance to kiss you

And again, after everything that we've been through

I really, really miss you

But I gotta let you go 'cos I know that I'll never ever get you...

Again