The meaning of Life is Death

All this anger I have felt my life is kinda hopeless/

To the truth I am devoted but not coping my hearts broken/

I'm sure these thoughts are colder and much deeper than an ocean/

Am I lacking devotion eye's wide with emotion/

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I want to drift off to sleep into the deepest of comas/

Die choaking in a dream before I have even awoken/

The casket is closing and the darkness approaching/

My hearts partially frozen but this is the path I have chosen/

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Eyes closed open mind inside vibrations I have felt/

Am I awake or am I dreaming these feelings I can't tell/

Have I risen up from hell or have I fell from heaven/

The questions are never answered I guess it's part of this lesson/

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Continue stepping out the darkness on this path that I'm treading/

With my confessions it's not by chance the karma I'm getting/

Negative thought's kept setting in not sure why I'm letting them/

Is this the cost of knowing truth and the cause of expressing it/

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I thought I was thinking but parroting beliefs seems to lead to a lack of wisdom/

When I had to make my own decisions it was like chasing a homing pigeon/

Mind stuck in a prison no critical thinking the religion I lived with had made me a victim/

My brain was spinning I failed to listen quarantined life inside a television/

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It seemed I had been defeated, the wasted days are mounting up/

It feels like I'm dreaming but I was awake and about to jump/

There's no ladders I can see but the snakes I've found enough/

No matter how you play the game, you are bound to round them up/

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God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change/

I deal with the pain so give me the courage to change the way I am/

Change the things I can, and give me the wisdom to notice the difference/

I'm praying and wishing, facing the sky I can only hope you're listening/

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I never managed to find God, I was the one that was found/

My sound echos around the eternal grounds of this Earth realm/

I've been cursed now, but at the same time I'm also gifted/

I feel pain in my mind, that's why I hide from my thinking/