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Lyrical Analysis of...

DnD Rap Review Chapters 1-5

  1. Story starts off, all a’ us in a bar
  2. Blanca's playin' bartender, Armina ain't far
  3. When along comes Gurt, hot stud of the hour
  4. Trotting in on his horse, and Miss Kenzie gets sour
  5. So Gurt the horse lover gets off his noble beast
  6. And shoves it into her, but his bad luck increased
  7. As Beatrice the Third falls over on top
  8. And starts going wild, kicking all about
  9. Kenzie throws an axe, Gurt's kicked in the face
  10. Random cat get sat in the middle of trouble
  11. As people flee the bar and run outside,
  12. In enters a man and his posse of followers.
  13. The main man Frederick, dual rapiers at his side
  14. And Jennifer, and Kat, a pair of ruthless homicides
  15. And Ren, a hot woman...Wait, No, he's a man....Right?
  16. Freddy does a backflip and smashes the window
  17. As his gang of misfits go in th' door like normal
  18. "Dead guy! Dead guy!" yells the random crew
  19. So everyone runs out to see what's new.
  20. Creature in the window, just up the stairs
  21. Poor guy was thrown out, but nobody cares
  22. Everyone charges up to fight the intruder
  23. As Gurt loots the body, and calls his horse closer.
  24. Arrows start flying, when the baddie's revealed
  25. Covered in feathers, two men at his heels.
  26. Kenzie go hard, not an arrow gets past her
  27. Meanwhile Armina climbs to th' upper window.
  28. Gurt tries to mount his horse, but falls right over
  29. As one of Blanca's arrows enters Gurt's shoulder
  30. Kenzie charge in with a bloodcurdling cry
  31. And cuts a guy in half, tossing him to th' side
  32. Armina sneaks in, stabs a guy in the back
  33. And poor dude stumbles backwards, falls like a sack
  34. Straight out the window, flailing his body
  35. And falls right on Gurt, who crying for somebody
  36. The battle continues, till the Harpie is wounded
  37. And vows to come back, in the name of Vojin.
  38. Vojin, some group that wants to start some terror
  39. Or something, keep in mind, we don't really know either!
  40. Everyone packs up and gets ready to go
  41. To speak with the king back at (PLACE )
  42. Gurt picks a fight with main man Freddy
  43. Who uses his god powers to make Gurt unsteady
  44. Blanca plays the Jew and asks for more money
  45. While Armina looks around for arrows and berries
  46. Kenzie takes the cat and ties it to her body
  47. And all set out to travel the forest in a hurry
  48. After a few hours, all decide to take a rest
  49. Sit down near a fire, sacks pulled up to th' chest
  50. Frederick tells a very said backstory
  51. About how his sister got killed, or something
  52. Gurt steals some wine from Blanca, gets wasted
  53. Right as a band of baddies us chases
  54. Armina shoots some arrows, true to their mark
  55. As Blanca and the crew get to doing their part
  56. Gurt passes out from intoxication
  57. And Kenzie won't wake up, sleep her fixation.
  58. Bad Lady know's Freddy, she stabs him and flees
  59. And Fred goes existential, drops to his knees, says
  60. "Blanca, you's from the future, I see it in this rock"
  61. And that's about it for the night full of shock.
  62. Now the Muse don't know what happens next,
  63. Since by the time he awakes, everyone already left
  64. But more battles and chaos, explosions galore
  65. As Gurt fends for his life, from one, two wolves more
  66. Eventually comes the time when all the baddies are dead
  67. And it takes the group an hour to loot the bodies, toe to head
  68. Gurt prays for his horse, gets told off by heaven
  69. And randomly finds a carriage that takes him right past them
  70. Kenzie jumps in too, and ride for a while
  71. Until Blanca Hexblasts them and starts a small fire
  72. Kenzie kills the cab driver, Armina keeps distance
  73. As the group makes their way to the walled city of (PLACE)
  74. They explore for a while, before heading to th' castle
  75. To talk to the king, about something or other
  76. This being Gurt's hometown, he asks about th' princess
  77. Who actually be a dude, he just like to wear a dress
  78. Everyone goes in, but before they can enter
  79. They have to fight to the death, to enter the king's chamber!
  80. So in enters some knights, and a duel ensues
  81. They begin by throwing taunts at Gurt, who they knew
  82. Failed the last time with the king he tried for audience
  83. But little did they know how much stronger he'd gotten.
  84. A very long battle, but the last knight is slayed
  85. With a couple of arrows, and slaps to the face.
  86. The party approaches the door to the king
  87. But find themselves in the midst of a kidnapping!
  88. Some dragon dude is smacking the king silly
  89. As this blind chick walks in to beat some willies
  90. >That's you, Nate. You the blind lady, monk person.
  91. >Not sure if you hot tho. Can be if you want.
  92. >Gurt is, for sure. Cause I'm a midget
  93. A big battle ensues, dragon boi spits fire
  94. And Gurt gets feet scalped, and cries in terror.
  95. Eventually both baddies are thrown out a window,
  96. And the king is saved, by the blind monk and crew.
  97. What will come next in this adventurous tale?
  98. Fo shizzle, we know not, but it finna be lit, dawg.
  99. Dig it. Fo shizzle!

Lyrics added by T-Dizzle

LYRICAL GRADE

RHYME DENSITY

0

RHYME LENGTH

1 syllable
2 syllables
3 syllables
4 syllables
5+ syllables
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