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Lyrical Analysis of...

My Past

  1. see you walking 'round the block
  2. I know that I got to stop
  3. I be getting letters home that I'm doing better
  4. I've had problems for 16 years
  5. I always be shedding tears
  6. making unreasonable fears
  7. I always try to find the light but that is a harder fight
  8. I always live in the darkness
  9. I don't what's wrong or right
  10.  
  11. I always see my past
  12. I know that its gonna last
  13. I wish I could change all the bad decisions that I have made
  14. I have a bright future ahead of me &I am strong
  15. I am smart and if I screw up I won't have no one to love
  16. I always see my past
  17. I know that's its gonna last
  18. I always have these thoughts
  19. about all the problems that I cause
  20.  
  21. yeah, my parents, they worry about me
  22. I don't want them to worry 'bout me
  23. but I didn't mean to break their trust
  24. I just didn't want to open up
  25. they said that they would help me in a sticky situation
  26. I got to live wit all these hesitations
  27. n I got to learn to be patient
  28. if I ever talk about my problems
  29. it'll make me seem just like a drama queen
  30. I just have some problems I just need to keep to me
  31. I've had thought in the past about dying
  32. every time I think about it I start crying
  33. when people ask me how my day was I'm saying
  34. "It was fine"
  35. but like Pinocchio, I'm lying
  36.  
  37. I overdosed at school about a year ago
  38. I took to many drugs and I was moving real slow
  39. one day I got really stressed
  40. about the midterm test
  41. felt like an anvil on my shoulders
  42. being squished by a boulder
  43. I took to many pills and I couldn't feel nothing
  44. I couldn't speak up when I was told to say something
  45. I couldn't stand up, only able to throw up
  46. I couldn't stay awake
  47. some people thought it was fake
  48.  
  49. my past will have bad stuff
  50. even when times get tough
  51. when I have enough
  52. I listen to juice but he talks about drugs
  53. but he ain't talkin bout the good stuff he talks bout the bad stuff
  54. the things that puts you in a hearse
  55. when you feel the lowest of the low or worse
  56.  
  57. when I think about my past
  58. I know that its gonna last
  59. it haunts me every time so I just gotta laugh
  60. cant show my pain
  61. gotta hide it in my brain
  62. I know I ain't getting my life back
  63. and that's just a fact
  64. I don't share my feelings I don't like communicating
  65. parents don't understand kids thoughts, it's complicated
  66. I be sitting back thinking bout life so much I'm contemplating
  67.  
  68. my past
  69. my past
  70. I know that it's gonna last
  71. my past
  72. my past
  73. time be moving way to fast
  74.  
  75. I be in my room so much that I start fading
  76. sometimes just I don't want to be waking
  77. I feel like rapunzel being stuck in the castle
  78. this quarantine stuff I just can't handle
  79. sometimes the grim reaper comes to visit me
  80. but I guess god agreed it's not the right time you see
  81. my past that really be haunting me
  82. God gave me more time to live my life
  83. after I od'd it was him who kept me alive through the night
  84. he wanted me to awake to the nice sunrise
  85. and have pancakes on my breakfast plate
  86. (and it's the life I learned to appreciate)

Lyrics added by dee999

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