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I still remember it all

  1. Would've, could've, should've, words bouncing in my head
  2. Hypothetically wondering, did I have to more?
  3. Asking myself unanswerable questions, believing in lore
  4. You would love me forever, at least that's what you swore
  5.  
  6. It's been a long, long time since we broke up
  7. In the empty parking lot as the rain fell
  8. It was supposed to be fun turning twenty one
  9. But now I'm all alone with my thoughts
  10.  
  11. It was cold outside as I held your hand
  12. Watching the dry leaves fall from the trees
  13. And then I told you: "I wish this would never end."
  14. And you answered with: "It doesn't have to."
  15.  
  16. Oh, you were quite convincing and I was quite the fool
  17. As you picked me up and then you went ahead and used me as a tool
  18. I let you take me to places I have never seen before
  19. Because I was so convinced that you were the one
  20.  
  21. And I saw the "Welcome to New York" sign as we headed home
  22. In your dad's old pickup truck and
  23. Remember when we picked up apples in upstate?
  24. I still remember it all
  25.  
  26. We played Sparks Fly on repeat as you looked at me
  27. Almost running the red light in the process
  28. And I giggled and blushed as I kicked my feet
  29. While some old rom com was playing on the TV
  30.  
  31. I tried so hard to make things work
  32. But you were still leaving space for her
  33. And I sat on the stairwell looking at my phone
  34. As the hours passed and you still weren't home
  35.  
  36. When you finally arrived at 2:30 A.M.
  37. You smelled like a combination of vodka, weed and sex
  38. But I didn't want to know it was true 'cause I didn't wanna lose you
  39. And you took that for granted and went to bed and
  40.  
  41. I sat on the kitchen island with a plate of food
  42. You sat next to me asked if it was "for me or for you?"
  43. I was hungry, but I didn't want to sound rude
  44. So I stood up and mumbled: "It's for you."
  45.  
  46. You never cared about how I felt or what I wanted
  47. And I know some of these details aren't important
  48. Remember how you gaslighted me at my best friends engagement party?
  49. I still remember it all
  50.  
  51. And probably, most likely
  52. When we turn thirty
  53. I'll still feel something for you
  54. Oh, I'm out here blue, what to do?
  55.  
  56. Friends come and go and the seasons change
  57. But I'm still here where you left me babe
  58. I don't wanna drive past that parking lot ever again
  59. 'Cause then all the memories come flooding back
  60.  
  61. I don't know if we got lost in translation or I asked for too much
  62. Nor will I ever know why you suddenly wanted to break up
  63. 'Cause you kept me a secret, but I kept you like an oath
  64. Because I swore to love you and protect you, but it didn't go both ways
  65.  
  66. They say all's well that ends well until it didn't at all
  67. And I was risking losing my mind in the name of love
  68. But then I always remember that one fateful fall
  69. I still remember it all
  70.  
  71. And we don't talk much, so I guess things haven't changed
  72. 'Cause your lack of communication caused me some deep rage
  73. And even though for some time I was just a girl you banged on your couch
  74. I wanted something more, but you jumped up at the sound
  75.  
  76. 'Cause I know you got commitment issues and I accept that
  77. But every time you argue with me, I think I can fix you and that's a fact
  78. And obviously you only break your favorite toys
  79. You play with them, throw them away, then feel nostalgia for it, hey
  80.  
  81. And I didn't understand how after the breakup you were perfectly fine
  82. As if you leaving me didn't shock you deeper than an earthquake
  83. And although after all this time, I'm not even close to being alright
  84. But I came to terms that you didn't love me, I still remember it all
  85.  
  86. So was it over then and is it over now?
  87. Was it all for show in my big, blue ball gown?
  88. Cause if the shoe didn't fit, would you have forced it?
  89. Or would you just wait until midnight came?
  90.  
  91. If this were a movie, I would've rewritten the ending
  92. So we'd be kissing in the rain as a love song played with the credits
  93. And then the curtain would fall as a symbolism of how
  94. We fell in love, I still remember it all
  95.  
  96. 'Cause just how you won the girl, you lost her
  97. Did you love me as a person or who I was back then?
  98. Because people change and the feelings, too
  99. And I guess that's just what happened to you
  100.  
  101. And people say I'm bitter and people say I'm jealous
  102. Is it really my fault that I'm overzealous
  103. To get a man back just for the feeling?
  104. Just for the rush of an argument that'll leave me reeling?
  105.  
  106. I've been known to constantly act on instinct
  107. And I don't think with my mind, I think with feelings
  108. I promise you forever and always even though I can't give it
  109. And I say empty promises in hopes you'll need it
  110.  
  111. I forgive, but I don't forget, and you can tell
  112. Every time we fight, I tell you I still remember that one day
  113. You appeared drunk, crashed my car and ran away
  114. You think I'm dumb, you think you're smart, but I still remember it all
  115.  
  116. And probably, most likely
  117. When we turn thirty
  118. I'll still feel something for you
  119. Oh, I'm out here blue, what to do?
  120.  
  121. Don't blame me for anything when all you have is yourself to blame
  122. Pick up the phone instead of the controller 'cause this is not a game
  123. I'm no damsel in distress, not someone that you can tame
  124. But every time I feel sad, I go on my phone and look up your name
  125.  
  126. I can't believe
  127. I'm back in the
  128. Old habit
  129. Of fallin', fallin'
  130.  
  131. Fallin' down
  132. The rabbit hole
  133. It's getting old
  134. I know, ay no
  135.  
  136. I can't believe
  137. I'm back in the
  138. Old habit
  139. Of fallin', fallin'
  140.  
  141. Fallin' down
  142. The rabbit hole
  143. It's getting old
  144. I know, ay no
  145.  
  146. And probably, most likely
  147. When we turn thirty
  148. I'll still feel something for you
  149. Oh, I'm out here blue, what to do?

Lyrics added by Beatrixxx

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